Junk Mail

I’ve always gotten a minor amount of junk mail in my work email box. For a while last summer I received a Britney Spears crotch shot about once a week. But lately it’s gotten completely out of control. This week so far I have received TWENTY-NINE emails urging me to “click here and enlarge my penis.” And it's only Wednesday morning. It’s really become quite annoying. Here are some example messages; let me know if anything sounds appealing and I can forward you the appropriate link.

• Be the stud of the party, EVERY party.
• Your throbbing powerful tool will keep her satisfied.
• Performance in bed is set to soar.
• Love the feeling of my huge manhood driving into her non stop.
• Turn the tool in your pants into a power drill.
• Lovin’ her the right way means filling her up the right way.
• The growth that I got on my manhood is AMAZING.
• A big schlong is a man’s best friend.
• The girls will go "wow" and wild.
• Thick, long tools are a woman's favorite instruments.
• Boost your confidence with your new-found instrument.
• Always wanted to shaft your shaft deeper into her? Now you can.
• Give her a ride on your ROCKET.

I’ve tried responding to the messages with “Unsubscribe” but somehow they’ve got it set up so I am just responding to myself. HOW DO I MAKE THIS STOP?!?